What Deeds Actually Count as Cheating in a Relationship

What Deeds Actually Count as Cheating in a Relationship

Our monogamy relationships definitely suffer if we visit a sex bar every now and then. But we still love diversity and experimenting with new kinds of sexual activities. So does following our inner nature really count as cheating? Is it acceptable to visit a sex bar while you’re in a relationship, from any standpoint?

There have been a lot of studies conducted around relationships that sought to find out how many people cheat on their partners on average. The surprising fact is that the numbers are incredibly inconsistent and inaccurate. Why? Because cheating usually involves a lot of lying. One anonymous British survey, however, found that 32% of men and 45% of women have admitted to cheating.

The drama is everywhere and almost every one of us have accused our partners of cheating, at least inside our minds. But a lot of time, it’s pretty much unclear what we mean when we say cheating. Cheating might be very different for one couple than it is to another. Most of the time it means penetrative sex or an actual intercourse, but there are people who think otherwise.  Sometimes, installing Tinder without ever using it is enough to start an argument. So, to clear out the smoke and get some clear definitions, we’re looking into the subject. Today were going to look at all the colors of cheating and what it means various people.

What Cheating Means In Front of The Law

The law holds a dry definition of cheating. It means sexual contact outside of marriage. Though people are still willing to take their arguments to the next level. They come up with the most absurd accusations on how their partner cheated on them. Their accusations are often empty and even sick. Maybe they found one of their own panties in their husband’s closet. Maybe a woman’s vagina was too loose. Anything can serve as a basis to accuse your partner of cheating. Especially when they’re looking to file divorce. But the law doesn’t seek to fix your marriage or provide a better solution. If it’s over between you then its over. Nobody’s trying to fix it. Often enough, divorce is all about division of property and children.

What Cheating Means For a Prostitute

A lot of people welcome others in their bed, even prostitutes. It’s completely okay for them to know about their partner having sex with someone else. As long as they know about it. The most important thing is trust. If that trust is broken, then the relationship is broken as well. So at its core, cheating is a breaking of trust.

These people are open enough to accept that their partner has different cravings and sexual fantasies that they wouldn’t want to take part of. They accept, even recommend that their partner should visit a professional sex worker. It’s an existing arrangement and it can even benefit a relationship.

One-sided excuses are just lame and disgusting in general. Some say that they were in a marriage for 30 years and there is no sexual contact anymore. Others „well I was drunk and outside of the country, it doesn’t count”. So, for a prostitute, cheating is completely based on a couple’s individual agreements. Which is quite reasonable in my opinion.

What Cheating Is From a Moral Perspective

At their core, every relationship is based on a set of arrangements. Every relationship has different arrangements and the partners have different expectations as well. To them, cheating means any other kind of related activity that happens outside their actual relationship.  It isn’t necessarily sexual contact. Even an intense friendship can be more than enough. If either party in the relationship sparks jealousy, that’s enough to make things flying. For some parties, however, cheating means the act of putting your penis somewhere it doesn’t belong.

Couple laying in the grass.

What Cheating is To a Therapist

A therapist’s take on cheating is what I found to be most reasonable. Cheating happens when the agreement between two people is broken. When the feeling of betrayal creeps in. Sometimes it can be sexual contact. While other times, only flirting with someone else is enough.  In the end, it only boils down to communication. We also have to ask this question from ourselves, „What does a monogamy relationship mean to me?”.

Jealousy can be overwhelming when you see your partner being even a bit intimate with someone other than you. Especially if someone broke your trust prior to your current relationship.

What Cheating Means in An Open Relationship

An open relationship operates on the loosest terms. It usually doesn’t come with sexual restrictions, so both parties can freely have other sexual partner or visit a sex bar. But it does operate on a number of solid arrangement. Once one party breaks them, then the relationship flies out the window. If either of them has sex with someone without their partners’ knowledge, they’ll break trust. Which means the end of the relationship most of the time.

To Conclude

People in relationships get to choose the game they want to play but will have to obey the rules. Trust is the most important thing, and some people are more completely okay with their partner going to a sex bar. As long as they know about it.

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